I visited the girls on Christmas and left with a peace of mind and a feeling of peace in my heart. That was the first time I seen them at home and so I think it made me feel a whole lot better knowing that they are home now and very well taken care of. Pace and Nichole looked very tired lol and I can only remember those days. I remember what it was like doing that with my son.
They look like parents now! Its great and their house feels wonderful and complete now. Nichole and Pace are very good with the girls. I knew they would be.
My relationship is still good with them. We don't talk as much but that's to be expected when they have such a busy life right now. Taking care of the girls and having a bunch of friends and family visiting those sweet little girls. It makes me sad in a way because I really miss talking to Nichole everyday. She is an amazing woman. She has helped me in so many ways with a lot of things.. She really did become my best friend during my pregnancy.
Pace is a good person as well.. He always gives the most constructive advice about things and makes me look at situations from different angles. They both have touched my heart in a way.
My breakdowns are few and far in between but when I do have them I just want to lay over and die.. I know that sounds a little harsh but its a heart wrenching feeling but as always I recover and get back to normal. I miss those little girls sometimes.. I wish we lived closer so that way I could just go see them and give them loves!
They really aren't going to know who I am.. I don't see them as much as I would like to but that's the way it has to be right now. I just hope one day they will come around and know that I love them so much.
For now I am trying to focus on where I want my life to go and raising my son. I am just trying to be happy. Even though everything is few and far in between right now.. it will all come together one day.. and I believe in that.
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